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Logan.WS / Quotes / Will Ferrell Quotes

Will Ferrell Quotes



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Funny and Memorable Quotes
500 Funny and Memorable Quotes
Will Ferrell
Here are some funny quotes by Will Ferrell. He is a really funny actor who became famous on Saturday Night Live. Will Ferrell can also been seen in Elf, Old School, Anchorman: The Legend of Ron Burgundy, Wedding Crashers, Talladega Nights: The Ballad of Ricky Bobby, Blades of Glory, and Kicking & Screaming.


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Will Ferrell (Tiger Woods): ... what can I say, I'm the best, in your face ...
From ESPY Awards on July 20, 2008
 
Also See: Best Quotes Sports Quotes Tiger Woods Quotes
 

 
Will Ferrell (Dave): ... ok, easy, easy, allright, I'm not your daddy here ...
From Undeclared
 
Also See: Father Quotes
 

 
Will Ferrell (George W Bush): ... George Bush always finds his man save for one huge exception ...
From Saturday Night Live: Weekend Update Thursday on October 23, 2008
 
Also See: Political Quotes Saturday Night Live Quotes
 

 
Christopher Walken (Bruce): ... guess what, I have a fever, and the only prescription, is more cow bell ...
Will Ferrell (Gene): ... thank you Bruce ...
From SNL (Saturday Night Live)
 

 
Will Ferrell (Tiger Woods): ... people are always asking, Tiger, how do you do it, and my answer is shut up ... I ask the questions around here, I'm Tiger Woods ...
From ESPY Awards on July 20, 2008
 
Also See: Sports Quotes Tiger Woods Quotes
 

 
Will Ferrell (Chazz Michael Michaels): ... for about a month my urine smelled like marshmallows ...
From Blades of Glory
 
Also See: Movie Quotes
 

 
Will Ferrell (Mr. Tarkanian): ... I am a strong man, anyone in this office take a run at me ...
From SNL (Saturday Night Live)
 

 
Jon Heder (Jimmy MacElroy): ... they are laughing at us ...
Will Ferrell (Chazz Michael Michaels): ... they laughed at Louie Armstrong when he wanted to go to the moon, now he is up there laughing at them ...
From Blades of Glory
 
Also See: Movie Quotes
 

 
Will Ferrell: ... forget twitter, I'm on the CB ...
From The Tonight Show with Conan O'Brien on June 1, 2009
 
Also See: Talk Show Quotes The Tonight Show Quotes
 

 
Will Ferrell (Phil Weston): ... how many sarcastic pills you take this morning?
From Kicking & Screaming
 
Also See: Movie Quotes
 

 
Will Ferrell (George W Bush): ... I've chosen to schedule this impromptu address at night, because quite frankly, every time I speak during the day the stock market goes in the crapper ... so sorry Asian markets, you take the hit on this one ...
From Saturday Night Live: Weekend Update Thursday
 
Also See: Saturday Night Live Quotes
 

 
Will Ferrell (Ron Burgundy): ... Brick, where'd you get a hand grenade?
Steve Carell (Brick Tamland): ... I don't know ...
From Anchorman: The Legend of Ron Burgundy
 
Also See: Movie Quotes
 

 
Will Ferrell (Ricky Bobby): ... absolutely ma-am, I would love to sign your baby ...
From Talladega Nights: The Ballad of Ricky Bobby
 
Also See: Love Quotes Movie Quotes
 

 
Chris Kattan (Office Worker): ... is there a problem with it?
Will Ferrell (Mr. Tarkanian): ... you do not hand in crap like this ... this looks like you took a crap or a dump in the printer, you are scum, I should fire you and burn down your house, I am this close to raping you ...
From SNL (Saturday Night Live)
 

 
Will Ferrell (Ricky Bobby): ... I got you Pepe Le Bitch ...
From Talladega Nights: The Ballad of Ricky Bobby
 
Also See: Movie Quotes
 

 
Will Ferrell (Ron Burgundy): ... there's only one thing a man can do when he's, suffering from a spiritual and existential funk ...
David Koechner (Champ Kind): ... go to the zoo, flip off the monkeys?
Will Ferrell: ... no, buy new suits ...
From Anchorman: The Legend of Ron Burgundy
 
Also See: Movie Quotes
 

 
Will Ferrell (Phil Weston): ... I almost had you ...
Robert Duvall (Buck Weston): ... what do you call that again when you almost win ... oh yeah yeah yeah, losing ...
From Kicking & Screaming
 
Also See: Movie Quotes Sports Quotes
 

 
Will Ferrell (Chazz Michael Michaels): ... whoever invented rope was a real a-hole ...
From Blades of Glory
 
Also See: Movie Quotes
 

 
Will Ferrell (George W. Bush): ... I come to you tonight amist a very important election between 2 very qualified candidates, the hot lady [Sarah Palin] and the Tiger Woods guy [Barack Obama] ...
From Saturday Night Live: Weekend Update Thursday on October 23, 2008
 
Also See: Political Quotes Saturday Night Live Quotes Tiger Woods Quotes
 

 
Christina Applegate (Veronica Corningstone): ... I will have have you know, that I have more talent and more intelligence in my little finger, than you do in your entire body, Sir ...
Will Ferrell (Ron Burgundy): ... you are a smelly pirate hooker ...
Christina Applegate: ... you look like a blueberry ...
Will Ferrell: ... why don't you go back to your home on whore island ...
Christina Applegate: ... well, you, have bad hair ...
From Anchorman: The Legend of Ron Burgundy
 
Also See: Food Quotes Movie Quotes Pirate Quotes
 

 
Will Ferrell (Phil Weston): ... what is wrong with you Terrence, I thought we were friends?
Jarrad Paul (Andy): ... my name is Andy ...
Will Ferrell: ... your name is liar, 'cause you are telling lies ...
From Kicking & Screaming
 
Also See: Friendship Quotes Movie Quotes
 

 
Will Ferrell (Ricky Bobby): ... winners get to do what they want ...
From Talladega Nights: The Ballad of Ricky Bobby
 
Also See: Movie Quotes
 

 
Perrey Reeves (Marissa): ... you forgot your birthday, damnit Frank ...
Will Ferrell (Frank): ... I'm such an idiot ...
From Old School
 
Also See: Birthday Quotes Movie Quotes
 

 
Will Ferrell (Frank Ricard): ... thought maybe I could crash here tonight, if that's allright with you, Marissa's going through some, personal stuff ...
Luke Wilson (Mitch Martin): ... personal stuff like you, ah, running through the neighborhood drunk and naked ...
Will Ferrell: ... that ... and and, some other stuff ...
From Old School
 
Also See: Drinking Quotes Drug Quotes Movie Quotes
 

 
Will Ferrell (Ricky Bobby): ... heck I just read in the newspaper they put a pig heart in some guy from Russia, you know what, I mean, you know what that means?
Michael Clarke Duncan (Lucius Washington): ... no, I don't know what that means, I guess longer lives ...
Will Ferrell: ... no, he didn't live ...
Michael Clarke Duncan: ... oh he didn't live ...
Will Ferrell: ... no ...
Michael Clarke Duncan: ... oh ...
Will Ferrell: ... it's just exciting that we are trying things ...
Michael Clarke Duncan: ... yeah ...
From Talladega Nights: The Ballad of Ricky Bobby
 
Also See: Life Quotes Movie Quotes
 

 
Will Ferrell (Buddy): ... we elves try to stick to the four main food groups, candy, candy cane, candy corn, and syrup ...
From Elf
 
Also See: Christmas Quotes Food Quotes Holiday Quotes Movie Quotes
 

 
Will Ferrell (Ricky Bobby): ... dear tiny Jesus, with your golden, fleece diapers, with your tiny little fat balled up fist ...
Ted Manson (Chip): ... he was a man, he had a beard ...
Will Ferrell: ... look, I like the baby version the best, do you hear me?
From Talladega Nights: The Ballad of Ricky Bobby
 
Also See: Best Quotes Movie Quotes
 

 
Tina Fey (Sarah Palin): ... Mr President, I don't want to go all Katie Couric on you, but, I think its actually the other way around, I think the Vice President reports to the President ...
Will Ferrell (George W. Bush): ... really, that's not what Dick Cheney told me when he sat me down the first day ...
From Saturday Night Live: Weekend Update Thursday on October 23, 2008
 
Also See: Saturday Night Live Quotes
 

 
Will Ferrell (Phil Weston): ... I am very, very, very, very, sorry, with a capital S and a capital ORRY ...
From Kicking & Screaming
 
Also See: Movie Quotes
 

 
Will Ferrell: ... there's no greater weapon in a director's arsenol than a strategically placed song ...
From 2004 Academy Awards Show (76th Oscars)
 
Also See: Movie Quotes Music Quotes
 

 
Will Ferrell (Dave): ... just feed me the rock, through the hoop, swish, count it, go in the locker room, take a shower ...
From Undeclared
 
Also See: Basketball Quotes Sports Quotes
 

 
Will Ferrell (Mugatu): ... I'm a hot little potato right now ...
From Zoolander
 
Also See: Food Quotes Movie Quotes
 

 
Kate Walsh (Barbara Weston): ... you know what Phil, you gotta stop, you went overboard ...
Will Ferrell (Phil Weston): ... what are you talking about?
Kate Walsh: ... you called a group of 10 year olds, losers ...
Will Ferrell: ... I did not ...
Kate Walsh: ... you screamed it through a cone, everyone heard you ...
Will Ferrell: ... well, what do you want me to call them, winners, because that would make me a liar, ok, at least give me that, I am not a liar ...
Kate Walsh: ... you just lied ...
From Kicking & Screaming
 
Also See: Movie Quotes
 

 
Will Ferrell (Buddy): ... you stink, you smell like beef and cheese, you don't smell like Santa ...
From Elf
 
Also See: Christmas Quotes Food Quotes Holiday Quotes Movie Quotes Santa Claus Quotes
 

 
Tina Fey (Office worker): ... car accident, oh my God, is he ok?
Will Ferrell (Mr. Tarkanian): ... hey, hey, not on my watch, ok, no personal phone calls, all right, I should smack you in the mouth, use the company time to talk to your disgusting whore friends, no, you do not do this!
Tina Fey: ... sorry ...
Will Ferrell: ... you do not!
From SNL (Saturday Night Live)
 

 
Carla Gallo (Lizzie Exley): ... how'd you get so smart?
Will Ferrell (Dave): ... um, I ah, I read, read like 8 or 9 books a week ...
Monica Keena (Rachel Lindquist): ... wow ...
Will Ferrell: ... also do a lot of speed ... all the time ...
From Undeclared
 
Also See: Book Quotes Drug Quotes
 

 
Michael Clarke Duncan (Lucius Washington): ... you're not going to live forever ...
Will Ferrell (Ricky Bobby): ... I'm not stupid Lucious, no one lives forever, no one ... but with advances in modern science ... and my high level income ... I mean like crazy think I can't live to be 245, maybe 300 ...
From Talladega Nights: The Ballad of Ricky Bobby
 
Also See: Crazy Quotes Life Quotes Movie Quotes
 

 
Will Ferrell (Buddy): ... Buddy the Elf, what's your favorite color?
From Elf
 
Also See: Movie Quotes
 

 
Will Ferrell (Phil Weston): ... you're my assistant, ok ... you're supposed to back me up and get me juice boxes when I tell you, now go get me a juice box ...
Mike Ditka: ... YOU KNOW WHO YOU'RE TALKING TO?
Will Ferrell: ... I'm talking to the juice box guy ...
Mike Ditka: ... YOU'RE CRAZY ...
Will Ferrell: ... I'm not crazy, I'm just thirsty ...
Mike Ditka: ... WHY DON'T YOU GO TO HELL ...
Will Ferrell: ... NO, YOU GO TO HELL, WHILE YOU'RE THERE, WHY DON'T YOU GRAB ME A JUICE BOX ...
From Kicking & Screaming
 
Also See: Crazy Quotes Food Quotes Movie Quotes Sports Quotes
 

 
Michael Clarke Duncan (Lucius Washington): ... I don't want to be raining on your parade ... but I got to tell you that was some of the dumbest driving I have ever seen in my life ...
Will Ferrell (Ricky Bobby): ... thank you ...
From Talladega Nights: The Ballad of Ricky Bobby
 
Also See: Life Quotes Movie Quotes
 

 
Will Arnett (Stranz Van Waldenberg): ... were you on steroids?
Will Ferrell (Chazz Michael Michaels): ... little bit, about a half a cup ...
From Blades of Glory
 
Also See: Drug Quotes Movie Quotes
 

 
Artie Lange (Gimbel's Santa): ... and ah what can I get you for Christmas ...
Will Ferrell (Buddy): ... Paul, don't tell him what you want, he's a liar ...
Artie Lange: ... let the kid talk ...
Will Ferrell: ... you disgust me, how can you live with yourself?
Artie Lange: ... just cool it zippy ...
Will Ferrell: ... you sit on a throne of lies ...
Artie Lange: ... look, I'm not kidding ...
Will Ferrell: ... you're a fake ...
Artie Lange: ... I'm a fake?
Will Ferrell: ... yes ...
Artie Lange: ... how'd you like to be dead?
From Elf
 
Also See: Christmas Quotes Death Quotes Holiday Quotes Movie Quotes Santa Claus Quotes
 

 
Will Ferrell (Ron Burgundy): ... they named it San Diego ... which ofcourse in German means a whale's vagina ...
From Anchorman: The Legend of Ron Burgundy
 
Also See: Movie Quotes
 

 
David Koechner (Champ Kind): ... what in the hell is diversity?
Will Ferrell (Ron Burgundy): ... well, I I could be wrong, but I believe diversity is an old old wooden ship that was used during the Civil War era ...
From Anchorman: The Legend of Ron Burgundy
 
Also See: History Quotes Movie Quotes
 

 
Will Ferrell (Ricky Bobby): ... its Magic Man ... and El Diablo ...
John C. Reilly (Cal Naughton, Jr.): ... what, what's diablo mean?
Will Ferrell: ... its like, its like Spanish for like a fighting chicken ...
John C. Reilly: ... that's awesome ...
Will Ferrell: ... I know ...
John C. Reilly: ... with the claws?
Will Ferrell: ... with the claws ... and the beak ...
From Talladega Nights: The Ballad of Ricky Bobby
 
Also See: Movie Quotes
 

 
Owen Wilson (John Beckwith): ... horny?
Will Ferrell (Chazz Reinhold): ... yeah, crazy horny ...
Owen Wilson: ... at a funeral?
Will Ferrell: ... grief is nature's most powerful aphrodisiac ...
From Wedding Crashers
 
Also See: Crazy Quotes Movie Quotes
 

 
Will Ferrell (Ricky Bobby): ... let me just quote the late great Colonel Sanders, he said, "I'm too drunk to taste this chicken" ...
From Talladega Nights: The Ballad of Ricky Bobby
 
Also See: Colonel Sanders Quotes Drinking Quotes Drug Quotes Food Quotes Movie Quotes
 

 
Will Ferrell (Frank the Tank): ... it's so good, once it [beer] hits your lips, its so good ...
From Old School
 
Also See: Drug Quotes Movie Quotes
 

 
Will Ferrell (Chazz Reinhold): ... funerals are insane, the chicks are so horny, its not even fair, its like fishing with dynamite ...
From Wedding Crashers
 
Also See: Death Quotes Fishing Quotes Movie Quotes Sports Quotes
 

 
Will Ferrell (Mugatu): ... I feel like I'm taking crazy pills ...
From Zoolander
 
Also See: Crazy Quotes Drug Quotes Movie Quotes
 

 
John C. Reilly (Cal Naughton, Jr.): ... she walked straight up to me, and grabbed me in the crotch ...
Will Ferrell (Ricky Bobby): ... yes, like a tractor beam of hotness ...
From Talladega Nights: The Ballad of Ricky Bobby
 
Also See: Movie Quotes
 

 
Will Ferrell (Alex Trebek): ... the sound a doggie makes ...
Darrell Hammond (Sean Connery): ... moo ...
Will Ferrell: ... no ...
Darrell Hammond: ... well that was the sound your mother made last night ...
From SNL (Saturday Night Live)
 

 
Will Ferrell (Mugatu): ... Derlicte, it is the fashion, a way of life inspired by the very homeless, the vargrants, the crack whores, that make this wonderful city unique ...
From Zoolander
 
Also See: Drug Quotes Inspirational Quotes Life Quotes Movie Quotes
 

 
Sacha Baron Cohen (Jean Girard): ... you know why I came to America, Ricky Bobby?
Will Ferrell (Ricky Bobby): ... public schools, healthcare system, giant waterparks, I mean the same reason anyone comes to America ...
From Talladega Nights: The Ballad of Ricky Bobby
 
Also See: Movie Quotes School Quotes
 

 
John C. Reilly (Cal Naughton, Jr.): ... me and Ricky since we've been little kids, man ... we go together like chinese food and chocolate puding, lets face it ...
Will Ferrell (Ricky Bobby): ... yeah, but Cal, those two things don't really go together ...
John C. Reilly: ... oh we, we go together like cocain and waffles ...
Will Ferrell: ... you know what, for instance, if you, if I say peanut butter and ...
John C. Reilly: ... ladies ...
David Koechner (Herschell): ... yup ...
John C. Reilly: ... right? am I right?
Will Ferrell: ... no, jelly ...
David Koechner: ... jelly?
John C. Reilly: ... I'm supposed to put jelly on a lady?
From Talladega Nights: The Ballad of Ricky Bobby
 
Also See: Drug Quotes Food Quotes Movie Quotes
 

 
John C. Reilly (Cal Naughton, Jr.): ... got a message for all of them, shake and bake ...
Will Ferrell (Ricky Bobby): ... what does that do, does that blow your mind ... that just happened ...
Sacha Baron Cohen (Jean Girard): ... what is that a catch phrase, or is that, uh, epilepsy?
From Talladega Nights: The Ballad of Ricky Bobby
 
Also See: Movie Quotes
 

 
Will Ferrell (Ricky Bobby): ... with all due respect, Mr Dennit ... I had no idea you had gotten experimental surgery to have your balls removed ...
Molly Shannon (Mrs. Dennit): ... ha ha ha ha ha ...
Greg Germann (Larry Dennit, Jr.): ... what, what did you say, what was that, what was that?
Will Ferrell: ... woah woah, I said with all due respect ...
Greg Germann: ... no, that doesn't mean you get to say whatever you want to say to me ...
Will Ferrell: ... sure, sure as heck does ...
Greg Germann: ... no no, it doesn't mean that ...
Will Ferrell: ... its in the Geneva Convention, look it up ...
From Talladega Nights: The Ballad of Ricky Bobby
 
Also See: Movie Quotes
 

 
Leslie Bibb (Carley Bobby): ... sweety ... Jesus did grow up, you don't always have to call him baby, its a bit odd and all praying to a baby ...
Will Ferrell (Ricky Bobby): ... well, I like the Christmas Jesus best, and I am saying grace ... when you say grace, you can say it to Grown-up Jesus or Teenage Jesus or Bearded Jesus or whoever you want ...
From Talladega Nights: The Ballad of Ricky Bobby
 
Also See: Christmas Quotes Holiday Quotes Movie Quotes
 

 
Will Ferrell (Ricky Bobby): ... here's the deal, I'm the best there is, plain and simple, I mean I wake up every morning and I kiss excellence, and nobody can hang with my stuff, uh, you know I'm just a, just a big hairy American winning machine, you ain't first, you're last, you know, what I'm talking about ... that phrase is trademarked and not to be used without the permission of Ricky Bobby Inc. ...
From Talladega Nights: The Ballad of Ricky Bobby
 
Also See: Best Quotes Movie Quotes
 

 
Chris Kattan (Doug Butabi): ... did Mom get lipstick on me?
Will Ferrell (Steve Butabi): ... yeah, but it looks like you were making out ...
Chris Kattan: ... sweet ...
From A Night at the Roxbury
 
Also See: Movie Quotes
 

 
Dan Hedaya (Kamehl Butabi): ... besides, all men are nervous the night before their wedding ...
Will Ferrell (Steve Butabi): ... oh, you mean, all guys are nervous and anxious ... and kinda hopes she eats a can of bochelism ... or, or maybe she can hang out with a deer and a hunter accidentally shoots her ... or or you know when she's sleeping she makes that nose whistling sound and you shake her to make her be quiet but what you'd really like to do is take her stupid little red tooth brush and ram it up her nostril into her skull ...
Dan Hedaya: ... these are perfectly normal feelings ...
Will Ferrell: ... ok ...
From A Night at the Roxbury
 
Also See: Death Quotes Hunting Quotes Inspirational Quotes Movie Quotes Sports Quotes Wedding Quotes
 

 
Will Ferrell (Steve Butabi): ... the truth is, I'm a rebel and you're like this sweet girl next door type ...
Molly Shannon (Emily Sanderson): ... Steve, you are forgetting, I'm in college, I go to college, ok? ... translation, drunken orgies with occasional CliffsNotes ...
From A Night at the Roxbury
 
Also See: Drinking Quotes Drug Quotes Movie Quotes School Quotes Sex Quotes
 

 
Craig T. Nelson (Coach): ... what do you guys have that none of the other teams have?
Will Ferrell (Chazz Michael Michaels): ... matching junk?
Craig T. Nelson: ... exactly ...
From Blades of Glory
 
Also See: Movie Quotes Sports Quotes
 

 
Will Ferrell (Steve Butabi): ... what's up? ... from out of town?
Loni Anderson (Barbara Butabi): ... Steve, don't hit on the bride's maid, it is your wedding ...
Dan Hedaya (Kamehl Butabi): ... you want to wait 'till after the wedding ceremony please?
Will Ferrell: ... right ...
From A Night at the Roxbury
 
Also See: Movie Quotes Wedding Quotes
 

 
Chris Kattan (Doug Butabi): ... you can take away our phones and you can take away our keys, but you can NOT take away our dreams ...
Will Ferrell (Steve Butabi): ... that's right, because we are like sleeping when we have them ...
From A Night at the Roxbury
 
Also See: Movie Quotes
 

 
Will Ferrell (Chazz Michael Michaels): ... mind bottling, isn't it?
Jon Heder (Jimmy MacElroy): ... did you say mind bottling?
Will Ferrell: ... yeah, when things are crazy and it is like your mind is trapped in a bottle ...
From Blades of Glory
 
Also See: Crazy Quotes Movie Quotes
 

 
Jay Leno: ... your wife must be a patient women ...
Will Ferrell: ... she's lucky ...
From The Tonight Show
 
Also See: Family Quotes Talk Show Quotes
 

 
Will Ferrell (George W. Bush): ... I start my day thinking about the warming of the globe and how we can get it warmer ...
From SNL (Saturday Night Live)
 

 
Will Ferrell (George W. Bush): ... it seems that liberals and godless tax raisers are trying to make me look bad, by using such things as facts ... and scientific data ...
From SNL (Saturday Night Live)
 

 
Will Ferrell (Buddy): ... this place [the mailroom] reminds me of Santa's workshop except it smells like mushrooms and everyone looks like they want to hurt me ...
From Elf
 
Also See: Christmas Quotes Food Quotes Holiday Quotes Movie Quotes Santa Claus Quotes

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